Nick David Wright

Living well, laughing often, loving much.

Archive for December 2009

Fear

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When I was growing up, it was said that the only thing to fear is fear itself.

But recently I have heard and read multiple comments stating that it is okay to be afraid, that it is healthy and normal.

I vehemently reject this idea.

It is not normal and healthy to be afraid.

While I was thinking about this subject, a recent experience came to memory.

When I was installing the wood stove in our house in Kansas I had to make multiple trips to the roof. I’ve never been fond of ladders, especially using them to get on and off roofs.

I had gone up and down several times that day, each time negotiating the gap between ladder and roof with much trepidation. It was taking me longer to get up and down the thing than the work I needed to do.

Finally at one point a lightbulb went on and I said “What am I doing?”

I realized that there was absolutely no point in being afraid. I realized that if I fell that there would be little I could do about it, it was either going to happen or not. And I realized that fretting about it might actually cause it to occur.

It felt as though a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. From that time on I scampered up and down that ladder like a squirrel.

And I have not been afraid of anything — and I really mean anything — since.

That is not to say that I have been inconsiderate of the consequences of my actions or of events surrounding me. But I am no longer afraid of anything that might happen. It will happen or not regardless of my emotional state. And should something bad ever occur, being afraid will certainly not help matters and could very well make them worse.

Written by Nick David Wright

December 31, 2009 at 5:00 am

Posted in Thoughts

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Riches

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1st shift work Saturday MANDATORY!

He knocked lightly on the door of the manager’s office.

“Yes?” the manager said.

“I’m not going to be in on Saturday.”

“Why not?”

“I have plans.”

“Like what?”

“Like not being here.”

“It must be nice not having to worry about keeping a job.”

“It is, everyone should live this way.”

“So, what … are you ridiculously rich or something?”

“Yes.”

“Then why work at all?”

“Because money is nice sometimes too.”

“But I thought you said you were rich?”

“I am. Not all riches are dollars.”

Written by Nick David Wright

December 30, 2009 at 5:00 am

Posted in Fiction

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White Rabbits – Percussion Gun

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I thought I’d kick off my semi-weekly Tunesday installments with a favorite video of mine.

Here is the White Rabbits with Percussion Gun.

Written by Nick David Wright

December 29, 2009 at 3:11 pm

Posted in Tunesday

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How fundamentalism sabotaged my life

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I recently picked up the book “I’m Perfect, You’re Doomed: Tales from a Jehovah’s Witness Upbringing,” by Kyria Abrahams, from the library.

It’s a story about a girl growing up as a Jehovah’s Witness, later to be “disfellowshipped.” I’m not particularly interested in reading about that group of folks but a snippet from the cover jacket caught my eye …

“… explores the ironic absurdity of growing up believing that nothing matters because everything’s about to be destroyed.”

And that resonated with me, because that’s exactly how I grew up.

I wasn’t taken to particularly extreme churches as a child, but the groundwork was laid. And when I found myself cast out of my mother’s house after turning 18, newly married and out in the real world on my own for the first time in my life, that early conditioning took control.

I never finished high school. I was failed my senior year for handing out “Chick tracts,” and I didn’t go back. College was out of the question because the rapture would happen any minute, why waste time in class when I could be out “winning souls.” Not that — to my knowledge — I ever actually won any souls. Funny how constantly arguing with people about how wrong they are tends to turn them away.

Eventually I realized how insane I was being and quit. Quit everything to do with Christianity. In fact, I declared myself pagan. But by that time the damage was done. I was too busy earning a living to go back to school. I’d found myself a career that I was good at that didn’t require schooling (photojournalism) and I coasted on that for nearly 10 years.

Now here I am 31 years old, working on finishing that high school diploma and trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. One thing I will be doing … living.

Written by Nick David Wright

December 29, 2009 at 2:59 pm

What do I want out of life?

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This is a question that has hounded me for some time now.

And I finally realized that I actually know exactly what I want out of life, I just have no idea how to go about getting it.

And what I want out of life turns out to be really simple:

  • I want to spend my time engaged in pursuits meaningful to me, not always chasing after money. In other words, I want to life a life and not spend all of my time earning a living.

At least, it sounds simple. Turns out, not really simple at all; unless of course you happen to win the lottery or get left millions by forgotten Great Aunt Millie. Neither of which conditions apply to me … yet … hopefully.

So how does one escape the seemingly-inescapable trap of working your life away? I have managed to discover a few tips and tricks and I’ll be happy to share them after I get my thoughts a little more in order.

Written by Nick David Wright

December 29, 2009 at 1:51 pm

Posted in Life

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